Posted on Wednesday, 17th February 2010 by admin

 

By Pat Hastings

Addiction is a disease that affects the person abusing as well as family members. Often likened to having “a hole in the soul,” it is a spiritual deprivation that requires the development of an inner spirituality for full recovery.

Spirituality is a connectedness with self, others and a greater power, referred to sometimes as God, or higher power, Source or Universe. Spirituality may be practiced through organized religion or not. Many people have been turned off by organized religion with the misunderstanding that spirituality cannot be obtained without it. But that is just not true.

Those who are addicted are disconnected from themselves, from others and from their Source. They are lonely, scared and confused. Often their lives are out of control and they’ve lost family members, jobs or homes due to their addiction. It is devastating for the person who is addicted as well as for their families.

Have you been affected by someone else’s drinking and drugging or another addiction like gambling, working, sex, spending?  Do you stay up at night worrying about someone you love?  Are you frustrated that your efforts of trying to control haven’t worked? 

The stress of living with someone who is addicted can have numerous effects. Physical problems may develop, including headaches, high blood pressure, insomnia, upset stomach, colitis or heart disease. Emotional problems include anger, resentfulness, irritability, loneliness, guilt and depression. discount diflucan online A person’s social life may also be affected, and often they find themselves withdrawn, aloof and isolated, or embarrassed, aggressive and controlling. Hopelessness and lack of faith may also befall a person living with an addict. Such spiritual problems can cause bitterness, despair and helplessness.

Family members often blame themselves for the behavior, try to control their loved one and in the end lose themselves. Being involved with an addicted person for any length of time, and trying to reason with them, can be discouraging. Children of addicts suffer because they think that if the parent really loved them, they would stop using. Many have turned to support groups like Al-anon and Al-ateen to cope with this devastating and life-threatening disease. What they learn is what is referred to as the three Cs: You didn’t cause it, you can’t control it and you can’t cure it.

As family members, we must learn that we cannot fix the problem. We need to allow addicts the dignity to recover at their own pace. Learning to detach with love is a skill that must be learned and practiced on a daily basis.

Detachment is regaining ones identity and taking responsibility for one’s own life – ultimately letting go of trying to control the behavior buy cheap online Camagra without prescription of someone else. Detaching doesn’t mean not caring, but it does change the focus inward and sometimes that means seeking help.

Spiritual Coaching can help both the addict and those living with buy cheap amoxil one. The goal is to support the movement from a place of dis-ease to a place of happiness and peace. All problems are spiritual problems in the sense that they arise when we feel disconnected from the Source of our being. Spiritual coaching supports a movement from an experience of disconnect to one of deep connection.  The effects of this type of coaching is to experience more peace and joy, a deepening of relationships, a stronger connection to God and others, finding true purpose and being present in a way that reflects inner love.

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